


It Looked Like Spilt Coffee

by DestielWS



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Accidnetal Wetting, Affairs, Alternate Universe - Domestic, Alternate Universe - Human, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Bottom Castiel, Cas Pissing, Come Sharing, Dean Pissing, Desperation, Established Castiel/Sam Winchester, Ex Sex, Lack of Communication, M/M, Omorashi, Past Dean Winchester/Sam Winchester, Polyamory, Sam Pissing, Threesome, Threesome - M/M/M, Top Dean, Watersports, safe sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-18
Updated: 2016-10-18
Packaged: 2018-08-23 04:40:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,676
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8314267
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DestielWS/pseuds/DestielWS
Summary: While at a local café, Dean sees that the man in front of him in line - Castiel - is extremely desperate to use the bathroom and can barely hold himself together. Dean takes care of his bill and tells him to go use the bathroom but then sees that he's locked out and moments away from humiliating himself in public. Dean feels bad for him and gets him outside just in time for him to wet himself. Dean brings him a change of clothes and talks to him a bit and finds out that this whole thing happened because Cas's husband is into pee-play and he was trying to surprise him, but overestimated how long it would be until he got home. After talking, they realize that Cas's husband is Dean's ex-boyfriend Sam and Cas is the man Sam left him for. Dean being a shameless bastard tells Castiel to have Sam invite him over for some wet fun for all three of him and within a few days, he's over at their house and what should just be kinky fun between adults, ends up an emotional trip to the past.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Not gonna lie this is pretty much a few thousand words of me trying to figure out how the fuck to write a threesome, a couple more thousand of me bullshitting my way through it, and then a few more of me trying to actually make this more than porn. I wrote it on a few hours sleep during work like the good employee I am. It's not bad for like a day and a half of writing I suppose...
> 
> Also excuse any formatting inconsistencies or discrepancies. I'm using a different program than usual to write since it's better for work flow and it fucks the formatting so bad and I have to shove everything through a few different programs and processes to get the spacing and everything looking normal. _FUCKING SMART COMMAS_

Inside a small café, the line to pay for your meal was getting longer and longer as the man at the front of the line took his sweet time flirting with the cashier and leaving a large tip as a way of flashing his wallet. Four people behind him, Dean impatiently groaned internally as he waited with his credit card and tab. The man at the front of the line finally moved on after writing his number down for the disinterested cashier and the next man waiting went up. He slammed his tab on the counter and stood there shaking and fumbling through his wallet for his money. Coins spilled from his hand and all over the floor.

 

“Shit!” He hissed, looking at them.

 

Dean stepped out of line and went up to him, putting a hand on his forearm. “You okay there?”

 

Castiel nodded and went to bend over to pick them up, but stopped halfway down and made a whimpering sound. Dean stared at him but then noticed he had darkness around the inside of his pant legs and he recognized that stain immediately.

 

“Go use the bathroom. I got this.” Dean said quietly, letting go of his arm, putting his own tab on the counter and setting his credit card down with it.

 

Cas immediately scampered off towards the bathrooms and Dean picked the coins up off the floor as the cashier rang up the total.

 

As Dean checked out, Castiel pulled at the door handle of the bathroom, but someone was in there and it was locked. He was trying to not look like he was on the verge of pissing himself in a small family-owned café, but when that was the case, that wasn’t easy. He kept pulling on the handle of the bathroom door and bouncing up and down on his feet, one hand completely wedged in between his legs.

 

Dean went to go wait by the bathroom and give him back his fallen coins, but saw he was still squirming outside the bathroom. Dean put the change into an empty pocket and ran over, swiftly grabbing his arm and taking him out the employee exit to the back parking lot.

 

As soon as they were on concrete, Cas couldn’t take it anymore and started gasping and whimpering as his pants flooded, pee running down the legs and pooling under his feet.

 

“Oh God.” Cas breathed, looking at himself.

 

“I’ll be right back. I have an old pair of pants in the car.” Dean replied.

 

“No, no you don’t have to.” Cas sighed.

 

“I was going to give them to GoodWill anyways.” Dean stated with a reassuring smile. “Wait here.”

 

Dean quickly went around the corner to go to the front lot and get the clothes from his trunk. Cas looked down at himself, standing in the sopping wet pants, his socks and shoes squishing as his weight shifted.

 

“I’m pathetic.” He croaked, starting to cry into his hands.

 

When Dean came back, he saw Cas sobbing on a bench. He ran over to him and sat next to him. “Hey, it’s okay.”

 

“I look stupid.” Cas said, trying to stop crying.

 

“No, you look like you did something stupid and it bit you in the ass.” Dean chuckled. “No one drinks that much without using the bathroom without a good reason. Was it your girlfriend? She want you to do something fun tonight and you overestimated?”

 

“How can you tell?” Cas asked.

 

“Because I have been the one on the concrete in wet pants before.” Dean said. “It took him a while, but my boyfriend at the time was really into this kind of stuff. Anything involving piss, you name it. He was into it. But he was embarrassed and insecure and didn’t tell me about it until about eight months into our relationship. And we hadn’t really done too much with it since I wasn’t sure how I felt about it and I didn’t want to get overwhelmed with it. But it was our anniversary – one year – and I wanted to do something for him so I spent all day at work drinking and drinking and I didn’t factor in how the nerves would make me feel and how much I could actually hold and for how long and I ended up nearly getting in an accident because I peed myself in my car. So instead of having a nice anniversary dinner, my boyfriend helped me clean pee out of my car.”

 

Castiel started laughing at him and Dean faked to be offended. “Don’t laugh at my pain!”

 

“Sorry, but that’s hilarious.” Cas smiled.

 

“So what’s your story?” Dean asked.

 

“I’m gay, too. And my husband is really into this stuff like your boyfriend was.” Cas stated. “He got promoted this week so I wanted to do something to celebrate that would make him happy. And he still won’t be home from work for a while and I guess I kind-of outdid myself on how fast iced tea goes through one’s self. I always an overachiever though.” Cas replied. “He’s going to make fun of me for this though. He’s never going to let me live this down.”

 

“I’m bi, not gay, but it’s nice to know someone else has felt my pain of loving a kinky bastard.” Dean smiled. “You want to put on some pants that aren’t cold and wet now?”

 

“That might be nice.” Cas laughed, wiping the tears off of his face and standing up. “Don’t watch.”

 

“Alright. I’ll close my eyes.” Dean mused, handing Cas the dry pants and a plastic bag.

 

Dean sat back with his eyes closed, hearing the sound of Cas’s pants unzip. “They might be a bit small. They were from when I was in college and didn’t have the beginnings of a beer gut.”

 

Cas held back a laugh at the comment as he changed out of the pants.

 

“So how long have you been married?” Dean asked. “You said you had a husband?”

 

“Yeah. His name is Sam.” Cas smiled.

 

“Oh I had a boyfriend named Sam once.” Dean said. “He was actually the one that was all into watersports and wetting and stuff.”

 

“What a bizarre coincidence.” Cas hummed. “Why aren’t you together anymore?”

 

“He left me. Turns out he was going behind my back and sleeping with someone else.” Dean replied. “But I don’t have any resentment over it anymore. I was kind of a dick and going through things at the time.”

 

“Well, that doesn’t excuse him cheating on you and leaving you. That’s still not cool. Although I can’t talk on that, since my Sam did something like that.” Cas stated. “We’re not ex’s of the same Sam are we?”

 

“I don’t think so.” Dean laughed. “My Sam was very clear that he never wanted to settle down or have a family or anything. He never would have gotten married.”

 

“God, can you imagine how awkward that would be?” Cas chuckled, making quiet grunting noises. “I don’t think these are going to get zipped up.”

 

“Can I open my eyes and make fun of you?” Dean asked.

 

“Go ahead.” Cas sighed.

 

Dean opened his eyes and burst out laughing as Cas turned around for him. The waistband of the pants were around Cas’s hips with the zipper flap pulled open and stretched as far out as it could go. His butt was halfway exposed in the back and a bunch of pubic hair was exposed in between the zipper.

 

“Okay maybe I really underestimated how small they were.” Dean said.

 

“You must have had no muscle or body fat in college.” Cas chuckled, sitting back down. “My ass just completely fell out of these.”

 

“I get points for effort, right?” Dean smirked.

 

“Definitely.” Cas laughed, resting his head on Dean’s shoulder. “Thank you.”

 

“It’s alright.” Dean smiled. “Although I should say, I’m late picking my god-daughter up from piano lessons. I need to go do that.”

 

“Oh, shit I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to keep you or waste your time!” Cas exclaimed.

 

“It’s okay. I’m always late anyways. I’m a terrible godfather.” Dean said. “Although at the risk of being an even worse role model, if you and your husband are ever interested in screwing around with someone else, I would have no objection.”

 

Cas gasped and blushed. “You’re really asking me that?”

 

“You don’t have to say yes if you don’t want to.” Dean stated.

 

“Well, considering you look the way you do, I could put aside my worries.” Cas mused. “And I don’t think my Sam would have any objections.”

 

“Is that a yes?” Dean asked.

 

“It is.” Cas said quietly, taking out his number. “What’s your name?”

 

“Dean.”

 

“Dean? That’s a nice name.” Cas hummed, typing it into his phone. “I’m Cas.”

 

Dean’s laughter turned to a frown. “Like Casper?”

 

“Castiel. Is everything alright?” He asked.

 

“What’s your husband’s last name?” Dean replied.

 

“We took each other’s names when we got married. We hyphenated.” Cas answered. “Why?”

 

“What is it?” Dean repeated.

 

“Wesson-Novak.” He stated.

 

“Oh my God!” Dean scoffed. “Before you got married, he was Samuel Wesson, right?”

 

Cas nodded. “Do you know him?”

 

“You’re the son of a bitch he left me for!” Dean exclaimed.

 

“You’re that Dean?” Cas gasped, immediately hugging him. “I am so sorry. I felt terrible. I’m so sorry I never thought I’d actually have to meet the person I hurt.”

 

“It’s alright. I’m past it.” Dean said, pushing him off. “I am. I’m not mad at you. I can definitely see why he liked you better than me. You actually care about people.”

 

“I’m sure you cared about Sam when I took him from you.” Cas whispered.

 

“Don’t feel bad.” Dean gently patted Cas’s face.

 

“If it’s any consolation, I felt so bad about it the first time I had to go see a therapist and get anti-depressants for a year.” Cas said.

 

Dean laughed a little at him. “That’s adorably sad.”

 

“That was terrible! You’re terrible!” Cas exclaimed.

 

“Shut up and let me put my number in your phone before CPS gets called on me for not picking up my goddaughter.” Dean smiled.

 

“You still want to hook up with us?” Cas asked.

 

“Even more so now. You’re...well...I don’t need to explain why I’d be interested in you. And Sam’s probably smoking hot by now.” Dean mused.

 

“He is.” Cas muttered, passing his phone over. “I’m incredibly lucky.”

 

“Yeah you little boyfriend thief.” Dean teased, typing his number in.

 

“Don’t call me that.” Cas grumbled.

 

“Aw.” Dean patted Cas on the shoulder. “You actually have a conscience.”

 

“I try to be kind to people, yes.” Cas said, taking his phone back.

 

“I have a small child to pick up, but I hope I get a text sometime soon.” Dean smiled.

 

“Keep making me feel bad about this again, and you won’t.” Cas frowned.

 

“Homewrecker.” Dean snarked, ruffling up Cas’s hair and standing up.

 

“I will burn you.” Cas snapped.

 

“You’re into that, too?” Dean exclaimed. “I love when people light me on fire!”

 

“I hope you’re be sarcastic.” Cas said.

 

“Text me this week and find out.” Dean replied. “Bye, Castiel.”

 

“Goodbye, Dean.” Cas hummed.

 

“Oh! Your money!” Dean called. “If you want it back, text me!”

 

“Are you holding my pocket change ransom?” Cas scoffed.

 

“Yes. I want to see Sam.” Dean laughed.

 

“Fine. You’ll at least get to see him.” Cas said.

 

“Good. Eagerly awaiting your message.” Dean smirked.

 

Cas scoffed at him as he put his phone back in the tiny pocket of the jeans Dean had given him.

* * *

Over the week Cas had texted Dean, saying if he was free Friday night, he and Sam would be willing to have him over. Dean agreed and was now sitting outside of their house. It looked like the last place the Sam he knew would ever live. It looked like something an overbearing mom named Debbie or Barbara or something like that would live in. It had flowers and a garden and decorations and was well upkept from the outside. Which all made Dean nervous as to what he’d gotten himself into. What if Sam was a completely different person in all respects? Dean kicked himself for fretting and told himself to pull himself together and get out of the car and go in.

 

Dean walked up to the door, laughing at the daisies planted along the walkway. He rang the doorbell, and continued looking around and laughing. The door opened and he tried to stop laughing, but one slipped out.

 

Sam grinned widely at him. “It’s pathetic, isn’t it?”

 

“No, no it’s...nice.” Dean said. “Just, not what I expected from you.”

 

“It’s not me.” Sam chuckled. “All Cas.”

 

“You let him do that?” Dean asked.

 

“You don’t let Cas do anything. He just does it. He is a bossy little thing.” Sam scoffed, letting Dean enter the house.

 

“You expect me to believe that emotionally fragile, sensitive, sweet little guy I met last week is a bossy son of a bitch?” Dean raised an eyebrow at his former boyfriend.

 

“He is the bossiest person I have ever known.” Sam smiled. “Sam, marry me. Sam, buy me a house. Sam, make me a garden. Sam, paint the house. Sam, build a pool. Sam, have a threesome with your ex.”

 

“He made you do this?” Dean chuckled.

 

“Let’s just say he didn’t actually ask me.” Sam said. “He told me and I quote – Hey assbutt, the poor soul you dumped to run away with me is coming over to do pee things with us after work. See you when I get home. - and then he walked out the door.”

 

“Do you want me to leave?” Dean asked.

 

Sam shook his head. “If he thought I would have actually had a real problem with it, he wouldn’t have done it.”

 

“He sounds like a lot of fun.” Dean mused.

 

“He is. Been with him five years now and every second of it has been amazing.” Sam breathed.

 

“Minus the part where you left me and he felt so bad he needed therapy?” Dean smirked.

 

“Well, yeah. That was kinda sad. But other than that.” Sam laughed.

 

Dean chuckled and then sighed.

 

“It’s good to see you, Dean.” Sam said, hugging him.

 

“It’s good to see you, too.” Dean breathed, kissing his cheek before Sam pulled back and gently kissed him on the lips.

 

“Where’s Cas?” Dean asked, pulling back.

 

“Stuck in traffic. He’ll be here in less than ten minutes.” Sam replied. “Want some water? Soda?”

 

“If I have anything more to drink I will scream.” Dean chuckled.

 

“I figured you’d come prepared, but not even a craft beer?” Sam sang.

 

“Okay, fine. Maybe one beer.” Dean mused.

 

“That’s the Dean I know.” Sam snorted, going around the counter island and opening the fridge. As he bent down to grab the right beer, Dean checked him out, thinking to himself about how he loved when Sam wore those too-tight pants.

 

“Dean, stop staring at my ass!” Sam shouted.

 

“How can you tell?” Dean scoffed.

 

“I was in a relationship with you for a few years if you don’t recall.” Sam mused, turning around and shutting the door of the refrigerator. “I know how you act.”

 

“It’s been 5 years, Sam.” Dean laughed.

 

“And some people never change.” Sam teased, his phone going off. He picked it up and laughed loudly.

 

“Is that him?” Dean asked.

 

Sam nodded. “He just sent me a Snapchat instead of a text. Which means he’s having road rage.”

 

“He SnapChats you his road rage?” Dean smiled.

 

“Yep.” Sam replied, opening it up. Immediately, a car horn blared from the phone and then Cas’s voice yelling over it, “You little cock socking, cunt eating, son of a bitch! Cut me off like that, I’ll cut off your fucking head. Cut me off one more time, someone! I fucking dar-”

 

The video cut off and Sam started laughing.

 

“Okay now I’ll believe that he’s not as sweet as I thought.” Dean smiled.

 

“Ah the freeway at rush hour brings out the worst in all of us.” Sam mused, his phone going off again.

 

He tapped the screen and audio from the freeway began playing again, Cas screaming at a car in front of him. “Use your fucking turn signal you goddamned inbred hillbilly! Alabama Plate Delta 7 6 Charlie 3 0 I’m coming for you!”

 

“He’s not this irrationally angry all the time is he?” Dean asked.

 

Sam shook his head. “Not usually. I just don’t know whose dick he had to suck to get his license.”

 

“With a demeanor like that, probably a few people.” Dean mused, taking a sip from his beer.

 

“God, I love him.” Sam sighed, putting his phone back in his pocket. “Sorry, that’s probably weird to hear.”

 

“It’s fine. He’s your husband.” Dean replied, with a laugh. “God, I never thought I’d ever see you married.”

 

“Yeah. Me neither, honestly.” Sam said. “He didn’t give me much of a choice though.”

 

“He gave you an ultimatum?” Dean asked.

 

“No. It was more of I want to get married. I already found caterers. I hope you like me. And then 7 months later we got married. Half of that time was him convincing me as to why we should get married. One reason was if I married him, I’d get the best blowjob every night. He got tired of trying to keep that up after a week.” Sam explained.

 

“He sounds like a hassle.” Dean stated.

 

“No, he’s not. Just, when he’s got his mind set on something, he won’t change it for the world. So, maybe in that sense if what he wants to do isn’t the best idea, he’s a hassle. But, at least the ride’s fun.” Sam chuckled, Dean’s phone going off.

 

“Hold on.” Dean said, taking his phone out and checking it. “Cas got the wrong number.”

 

“Lemme see.” Sam drawled, taking his phone and laughing.

 

Off the freeway! Will be home in like 5 minutes. God I can’t wait. So hard. You and Dean aren’t doing anything without me are you?

 

“Do you mind if I text him back?” Sam asked.

 

“Go ahead.” Dean said, finishing the last of his beer.

 

This is Dean’s phone, honey. And no we aren’t. - S

 

After a few seconds another text came back.

 

Oh. Whoops. But good on you for the self control.

 

_ Shit. SHIT IS THAT A COP _

 

“Fuck.” Sam laughed.

 

“What?” Dean looked over at the screen.

 

_ SHIT THAT IS A COP _

 

_ HOW FAST CAN A COP CAR GO _

 

_ AM I FASTER THAN A COP CAR _

 

_ SAM I NEED ANSWERS _

 

“This is the most inconvenient time for a speeding ticket oh my God.” Dean snickered.

 

“If he ends up peeing himself getting pulled over, he is never going to agree to anything like this again.” Sam laughed, another text coming through.

 

_ I stopped. I wonder if I can get out of this? _

 

_ I really have to pee. This better be quick. _

 

_ He’s getting out. He looks gay. I think he’s gay. _

 

_ I’m sucking dick to get out of this. Be home in 10 instead. _

 

“Oh no.” Dean grimaced.

 

“He’ll be fine.” Sam said.

 

“You let him do things like this?” Dean asked.

 

“Like I said, you don’t let him do anything. You either love him for what he does or fight with him about things you can’t change.” Sam replied. “And trust me, loving him in a lot easier. He’s very stubborn.”

 

“Reminds me of someone I used to date.” Dean muttered.

 

“Shut up.” Sam snorted, shoving Dean in the shoulder. “Want another beer?”

 

“How quick can Cas suck a dick?” Dean replied.

 

“Very.” Sam answered.

 

“Sure then. I’ll take your word for it.” Dean said.

 

“Trust me, when he’s in a hurry, he’ll make you hurry.” Sam smirked. “I have no doubts that he’ll be here in 10 minutes or less.”

 

“He did not sound this bossy or obstinate when I was talking to him.” Dean replied as Sam handed him another beer and had one for himself.

 

“He is. You just saw the sweet side of him.” Sam smiled, Dean’s phone going off.

 

_ I forgot how easy closeted men are when they actually get with another guy. Guess who didn’t get a ticket for going 20 miles over the limit though? This guy. _

 

“He’s on his way.” Dean chuckled, putting his phone back in his pocket.

 

“That was quick. Did he actually do it?” Sam asked.

 

“Says he did.” Dean replied.

 

“Better rinse his mouth out good is all I gotta say.” Sam snorted.

 

Dean and Sam sat in a comfortable silence sipping their beers until Cas came home. He opened the door and dramatically slammed it shut, taking Dean’s beer and drinking the rest of it and gagging.

 

“Oh God this guy needed a diet with more fruit in it let me tell you. He wanted me to swallow, but the  _ taste _ ! Oh my God! The taste was too much - I had to fake swallow and then spit as soon as he wasn’t looking.” Cas exclaimed, setting the bottle back in Dean’s hand. “Hi, Dean.”

 

“Hey, Cas.” Dean nodded, setting the empty glass on the counter island in the middle of the room as Cas said hello to his husband.

 

Dean watched as Cas gently kissed him and then hugged him.

 

“I imagine you two had plenty of time to talk while I was horrendously late. Fucking turn signals, people! Use them!” Cas huffed.

 

Dean laughed at him as he went back over to where they were standing. “Yeah. We did.”

 

“Is he as hot as you thought he would be?” Cas asked.

 

“Yes.” Dean smiled.

 

“Good. Let’s fuck before I pee myself.” Cas said, earning a shocked gasp from Dean.

 

“You mean again?” Sam teased, yelling ow when Cas punched him in the arm. “Worth it.”

 

“It’s nice to know he wasn’t an asshole to just me.” Dean mused.

 

“He’s an asshole to everyone.” Cas replied, grabbing both their arms and walking. “Alright, bedroom time now.”

 

“You are bossy.” Dean laughed.

 

“Sam...” Cas drawled. “Did you tell him I was bossy?”

 

“Maybe.” Sam laughed.

 

“I guess that’s fair.” Cas said.

 

“Yeah, because even you know it's true!” Sam argued.

 

“Come on.” Cas sighed, taking both Sam and Dean's arms and pulling them towards the bedroom.

 

“He's got you whipped.” Dean sang, looking over at Sam.

 

“Oh, shut up.” Sam drawled.

 

“He's not wrong.” Cas stated. “I  _ have _ whipped you a few times.”

 

“What?” Dean laughed, looking over at Sam again and laughing.

 

“That's not what he meant, Cas.” Sam replied, exhaling deeply as they entered their bedroom.

 

“He lets you whip him?” Dean asked in amusement, Cas turning around to face the two of them.

 

“ _ Lets me _ ?” Cas raised his eyebrows at Dean. “He  _ begs _ me to!”

 

“Oh God.” Sam groaned.

 

“Why are you so kinky now?” Dean asked.

 

“I'm just going to pretend it's all the weird porn ads I kept getting on my laptop after letting you borrow it.” Sam said.

 

“You're the one who had a cheap firewall program in the first place. That wouldn't have happened if you would have protected your investment.” Dean argued.

 

“I shouldn't need a fancy four hundred-dollar firewall program to stop my dumb boyfriend from clicking on obvious spammy and virus-filled emails. “ Sam rolled his eyes. “Then again, there's a reason you always had to borrow my laptop because you kept killing your computer.”

 

“Oh, if you want to go into irresponsibility here-” Dean began.

 

“Hey, you said it not me.” Sam stated.

 

“You killed all the plants in the house!” Dean scoffed.

 

“They were fake!” Sam exclaimed.

 

“That's enough arguing.” Cas snapped. “I am horny and drank too much and brought the two of you back together after all these years to have fun and have an amazing threesome not argue over who was the worse boyfriend.”

 

“Idiot.” Sam retorted.

 

“Plant-killer.” Dean countered.

 

“Enough.” Cas repeated, frowning at them. “I am horrendously short of patience right now.”

 

“What's new?” Sam muttered.

 

“I'm sorry, what was that?” Cas asked.

 

“Nothing.” Sam replied.

 

“That's what I thought.” Cas smiled sarcastically.

Cas quickly grabbed Dean and began kissing him full-force, hands on his face and tongue in his mouth.

 

Dean stood unresponsive in surprise, eyes open wide. Dean pushed Cas off of him and stepped back. “Someone else's husband is kissing me right now.”

 

“That's kind of how threesomes work, Dean.” Cas said.

 

“Yeah but, my ex's husband.” Dean replied.

 

“Change your mind?” Sam asked.

 

“No, I just...uh...” Dean sighed, looking away from them.

 

“If you're not comfortable with this, that's alright, Dean.” Cas added. “We're not going to force you to do anything.”

 

“No, I know. I just. Last week I did not expect to ever see Sam again, let alone meet you and now here I am.” Dean replied.

 

“In my defense, you were the one forcing me to take your number a few days ago. “ Cas said.

 

“I know. I just can't believe I'm actually doing this.” Dean muttered.

 

“Right now, the only thing you're actually doing is nothing but keeping me waiting.” Cas stated.

 

Dean looked back up at him, unamused disbelief in his eyes.

 

“What?” Cas shrugged. “it's the truth.”

 

“Unless you're changing your mind right now, go kiss my fucking husband.” Sam laughed, pushing Dean forward into Cas .

 

“Okay.” Dean replied quietly. “If you're sure.”

 

“I'm sure, Dean.” Sam sighed. “If I had a problem with any of this, don't you think I would have mentioned it by now?”

 

“Fine. You're right. I'm being dumb.” Dean muttered. He looked back over to Cas and stared him in the eyes, then looking back away at Cas's hands on his arms, gently rubbing his shoulders.

 

“How did he ever pick me over you?” Cas asked, going back in to kiss Dean as Sam got undressed in front of them, stripping down to his boxers and then getting on the bed behind them. 

 

Sam waited patiently on the bed which was stripped down to just the sheets as Cas got Dean more relaxed and comfortable, gently touching his arms and face and making him feel like he was at home with people he knew and not his ex-boyfriend and his husband. It was understandably uncharted territory for Dean.

 

Cas pulled away from him once he felt that Dean was comfortable and then sat on the bed. Cas crawled over to Sam and started kissing him, patting the space next to him for Dean to join them. Dean kicked his shoes off and dropped his jacket to the ground before jumping onto the bed and sitting down.

 

“Okay.” Cas breathed, pulling away from his husband and turning to Dean. “Are you top or bottom?”

 

“Top. “ Sam answered.

 

Cas looked over at Dean expectantly. Dean sighed and nodded with a small laugh.

 

“See? Some things don't change.” Sam smiled.

 

“Sam once said you were the best lays of his life, second to me of course I'm sure.” Cas stated. “I'm feeling inclined to find out for myself.”

 

“You said that?” Dean laughed, glancing over at him.

 

“You're going to question that? Really?” Sam smiled.

 

“I'm not questioning that I'm an amazing lay. I'm just questioning why someone would say that about their ex to their husband.” Dean replied.

 

“Why wouldn't I? It's the truth.” Sam mused.

 

“Sorry if I dismiss honesty being your strong suit.” Dean remarked.

 

“If you're about to rehash his secret affair with me, I'll let myself out now.” Cas said.

 

Dean laughed and shook his head. “We're not. I said I was over it and I meant it.”

 

“If you say so...” Cas muttered. “Now take off your pants.”

 

“Whatever you say. You're the boss.” Dean chuckled , Cas crawling off to the other side of the bed and opening the drawer of a nightstand.

 

“Uh, Sam?” Cas called.

 

“What'd you do? Did you jam the drawer again?” Sam sighed.

 

“No, I think we forgot to get condoms.” Cas muttered.

 

Dean stifled back laughter and Cas glared at him.

 

“Married couples don't really need condoms. At least not those who aren't worried about getting pregnant.” Cas stated.

 

“I have some in my car.” Dean said. “You want me to get them?”

 

“Yes, please.” Cas answered.

 

“I'll be right back.” Dean chuckled, swinging his legs over the edge of the bed and standing up.

 

“Don't take too long!” Cas shouted as he walked out the door. 

 

“Why is that?” Dean smirked, turning around in the doorway.

 

“I have to pee obviously.” Cas stated. “I got held up having to suck a cop's dick.”

“We all have to pee and we all got held up because of that. “ Sam replied. “Take as long as you want, Dean. Torture him.”

 

“Oh you asshole.” Cas growled, slamming the drawer shut and going over to Sam with the bottle of lube in his hand. Cas grabbed Sam and shoved his hand onto Sam's lower stomach and Sam protested loudly as Dean left the room. 

 

Dean went out to his car and grabbed three condoms from the glove box – just for good measure – and then went back into the house.

 

When Dean entered back into the bedroom, Sam was kicking Cas away from him with his feet, both of them laughing as Sam proclaimed he wanted a divorce. Dean could tell that the formerly loose fabric of Sam's underwear was now shiny and clinging to the skin of his thighs in some places.

 

“Remind me not to piss Cas off.” Dean laughed, making himself known as he slowly entered the room again.

 

“He started it.” Cas stated.

 

“I think you both started it.” Dean smirked, undoing his belt and then his jeans, letting them fall to his ankles. 

 

“You're overdressed now.” Sam said to Cas slyly. 

 

“Want to undress me then?” Cas asked.

 

“Hell no. I'm not coming near you. First chance you get, you’re going to make me pee myself the rest of the way.” Sam snorted.

 

“Dean?” Cas looked up at him and undid the top button of his shirt.

 

“Anything to help a friend, right?” Dean sang, putting the condoms in his teeth and going over to him on the bed. Dean climbed back onto the sheets and began loosening up Cas's tie, pulling it off over his head.

 

“You could have kept the tie. He's hot when he's wearing nothing but a tie.” Sam mused.

 

“Well you should have said that, then.” Dean sneered, letting Cas pull his arms out of his black jacket and button-up all in on movement. Dean then quickly undid Cas's belt and pulled it out, dropping it off the side of the bed and unzipped his pants. “Here. Lift your ass.”

 

Cas did as told, pulling his hips up in the air long enough for Dean to pull the waistband of his pants out from under him along with his boxers and then he pulled them off the rest of the way over his ankles.

 

Dean took his shirt off over his head and then took the condoms out of his mouth. He tossed two of them over the edge of the bed with Cas's clothes. Dean picked at the edge of the wrapper with his fingers, furrowing his brow in frustration trying to open it.

 

“This is why I always opened the condoms.” Sam retorted.

 

“Shut up. “ Dean snorted. “The man who can't move out of fetal position because he'll pee himself does not get to insult me.”

 

“No, but I can.” Cas said.

 

“The other woman doesn't get to insult me either.” Dean stated.

 

“Ouch.” Sam laughed.

 

“But you can get me some scissors.” Dean added.

 

“Oh just give me that. I can open it.” Cas sighed, taking it out of Dean's hands and quickly ripping it open with his teeth. “There. Was that so hard?”

 

“Yes.” Dean answered.

 

“Were you always this whiny?” Cas asked, making sure the condom was facing the right direction before reaching out and sliding it on over Dean's cock.

 

“I'm not whiny.” Dean protested.

 

“Yes, he was.” Sam chuckled.

 

“Oh fuck you. “ Dean drawled. “You know, I thought I was agreeing to have sex with a sweet, cute, awkward guy who peed himself in a café - not get insulted by two assholes.”

 

“I'm sorry you were mistaken into thinking I was sweet.” Cas said.

 

“You're sweet.” Sam stated.

 

“If I wanted to get bossed around, I would go to your mother-in-law’s, Castiel.” Dean sneered.

 

“Oh you bastard.” Sam scoffed.

 

“You know she never liked me.” Dean said.

 

“In that case neither did I.” Sam replied.

 

“You would think you're the old married couple here, not us.” Cas mused.

 

“Oh come on.” Dean scoffed. “This is nothing compared to what we used to be like.”

 

“Oh I bet. Sam, where'd you put the lube?” Cas asked.

 

“I don't know.” Sam shrugged. “You threw it at me.”

 

“Yes. I threw it at you. Which meant you were supposed to catch it and put it somewhere.” Cas replied.

 

“Is that it?” Dean asked, looking to the side and onto the floor.

 

Cas sat up some and looked over Dean and nodded. “Yeah. Go get it, Sam.”

 

“Why me? I can't stand.” Sam argued. “Thanks for that.”

 

“Why do you think I want you to get it? “ Cas smirked. “Something interesting needs to happen here.”

 

“Oh you want interesting, how about I steal your new boy toy for interesting?” Sam growled, rolling over and swinging his leg over Dean's lap in one swift movement and kissing him. Dean made audible noises of confusion and pleasure as he felt piss running all over his stomach and legs – that wasn't his.

 

“He's not my new toy.” Cas stated. “He's yours.”

 

Dean pulled away panting and looked over Sam's shoulder at Cas. “I don't think I’m new.“

 

“You're refurbished then.” Cas stated.

 

“Sounds about right.” Sam laughed, slightly embarrassed. 

 

“You know, you owe your husband a vote of thanks.” Dean growled, pushing Sam down onto the bed beneath him, pinning him down at the shoulders with his hands.

 

“Why?” Sam responded.

 

“He taught you how to be a better kisser. It's about time you got some passion in there.” Dean retorted. “ 

 

“You know my ass is a better kisser than his mouth. Want a blow job?” Cas asked, having apparently gotten out of bed himself to get the lube.

 

“Yes, please.” Dean sang, sitting up off of Sam and adjusting his position so he was leaning back a little. 

 

Cas poured the lube liberally straight from the bottle onto Dean's erection and began smearing it around with his hand, lightly jacking Dean off in the process.

 

“I hope you taught him that, too.” Dean breathed, moaning a little.

 

“I taught him lots of things.” Cas replied. “Including German.”

 

“You taught him German?” Dean laughed.

 

“Ja. Ich spreche Deutsch.” Sam hummed.

 

“What else about you don't I know? “ Dean asked.

“That apparently marriage isn’t so bad to me. I changed my mind on a lot of traditional family things like that.” Sam said, smiling up at Castiel.

 

“Is now the best time to be getting romantic with your husband? When he's jacking off your ex?” Dean asked.

 

“It's never the wrong time to be romantic with my husband. That's why he's my husband.” Sam hummed. “Hopefully that's something you'll come to learn as well.”

 

“Oh God are you now once of those disgustingly cheesy couples that always talking about how in love they are?” Dean groaned.

 

“A bit.” Sam laughed. “You see Cas though. You try not becoming like that with him.“

 

“Is that a challenge?” Cas asked, taking his hand off of Dean's dick and pulling himself into Dean's lap. With the help of all four of their hands, Cas and Dean were able to get Dean properly inside of Cas comfortably.

“This is an amazing angle.” Sam breathed. “They should film more porn at this angle, though I could see how a bulky camera would have a hard time getting a good shot at all this.“

 

“What's it look like?” Cas asked, sucking on the side of Dean's neck as he began rolling his hips on him.

 

“Dean's cock looks massive.” Sam laughs.

 

“It feels massive.” Cas replied.

 

”This is very complimentary to my ego.” Dean chuckled.

 

“Everything's complimentary to your ego.“ Sam snorted. “But God, Cas, you look so stretched out.”

 

“I am. It's amazing how out of shape you get when you're only used to sleeping with one person.” Cas mused, bringing his lips up to Dean's face and kissing him on the lips some.

 

“You don't have threesome's regularly?” Dean asked.

 

“No, we do not. We are a fairly normal couple.” Cas stated. “I mean, minus the whips and peeing on each other.”

 

“Yeah, besides that.” Dean smiled.

 

Cas pulled his face away from Dean's just for a short enough amount of time so that he could reach over and put his hand on Sam's cock, trying his hardest to jack him off while also riding in Dean's lap.

 

“Are you a multi-tasker?” Dean asked.

 

“Usually. “ Cas replied. “If not, I can always try to be right?”

 

“Something...tells me you can multi-task here just fine.” Sam smirked, moaning at how warm Cas's hand felt inside his now cold and wet boxers.

 

Cas let his hand move in time with his own body as he moved up and down along Dean's cock, moaning at how painfully full he felt everytime he went further down onto Dean. Cas kissed him roughly, as if kissing him was the only way to learn anything about him, to know who he was and what he was like. 

 

Dean began to realize that the noises Cas made as he went downward weren't necessarily just of pleasure, but also of desperation. Cas was rather thin everywhere and Dean was willing to put money that the little bit of his stomach protruding wasn't from a few too many milkshakes.

 

“It makes it hard to keep control , doesn't it?” Dean asked. “Everytime you hit right about here...” Dean grabbed Cas and pulled him down onto him. Hard. And held him there.

 

“Yes.” Cas whined, squirming and whimpering as little droplets begun coming out the head of his cock.

 

“Don't try to stay in control. Lose control.” Dean growled. “I want you to lose control all over me.”

 

“I can do that.” Cas replied through labored breaths.

 

“Glad we can get that figured out.”

 

“Come on.” Sam whined, rocking his hips back up into Cas's fist for friction. “Keep going.”

 

Dean let go of Cas and Cas resumed moving, bringing his hips down on Dean harder and faster, crying out louder in in sexual pleasure and the small sense of relief he felt as small squirts of piss began coming out of him and wetting down their legs a little bit. 

 

Every time Cas let himself lose control, he would tighten up around Dean's cock and the pull of his muscles burned a little, but the good kind of burn.

 

With how great it felt to finally be relieving himself, Cas brought himself close to orgasm quickly, crying out loudly , the noises coming from him alone probably filling the entire house.

 

“Make those noises long enough and I'd bet money on being able to come hands-free at some point because of it.” Sam panted, the final word being rushed thanks to a loud moan coming from himself. 

 

“Fair warning, if you don't like other people's come on yourself, you're not going to be very happy.” Cas stated.

 

“No, of course I don-” Dean began, Cas interrupting him with a loud cry of “Fuck!” as come hit Dean in the chest and slowly began sliding down to his stomach. “Don't mind.” He finished.

 

“Good.” Cas panted with a sigh, holding his head on Dean's shoulder as he remained sitting in his lap, letting what was left in his bladder gently stream out, running down the length of his cock and then inevitably onto Dean's stomach, and then from there, soak into the sheets beneath them.

 

“Do you want me to get Sam?” Dean asked quietly.

 

“No.” Cas shook his head. “I can take this.”

 

Cas pulled himself off of Dean and fell on all fours in front of Sam.

 

“Where's a trashcan?” Dean asked, taking the condom off of himself.

 

“The bathroom right there.” Cas answered, pointing to a closed door in the room.

 

Dean got off the bed and went to throw it away as Cas crawled on top of Sam halfway and then lowered down, taking him into his mouth.

 

Dean could hear Sam moaning in ecstasy from the bathroom as he went to get rid of the condom. He came back into the room as Cas started working Sam up closer and closer to coming as well.

 

“Dean, come here.” Cas ordered.

 

Dean went back over to them and got on the bed again.

 

“You haven't had your fun yet.” Cas stated. “All the water you must have drank before coming here… Get my husband squeaky clean.” Cas said.

 

Dean stared at him blankly in surprise before nodding. “Okay.”

 

“Yeah, Dean. Make me come.” Sam panted. “Words I never thought I'd say again.”

 

“All you had to do was ask.” Dean grinned, taking his cock into his hand and shooting a powerful stream right on Sam's chest. Dean made sure to leave every inch of skin shiny and wet as he moved his arm from the chest to his arms, back to his chest, and then lower until he was pissing right on Sam's dick and Cas's face, the combination or of being sucked off and also pissed on at the same time, making Sam moan and writhe in pleasure.

 

“Maybe we should have done this threesome thing before.” Sam said slightly slurred.

 

“I agree.” Cas hummed. “This is very enjoyable on everyone's part it seems.”

“It is.” Dean nodded as his bladder finally resided empty once again. 

 

“Make him lick you clean, Dean.” Cas ordered. “You'd like to do that, right Sam?”

 

“Yeah.” Sam nodded vigorously. “Let me lick you clean, Dean.”

 

Dean's dick twitched in his hand just at the thought and he moved over up to Sam's face. Sam sat up a little bit and placed his lips on Dean's cock, moving up and down a few times and then teasing him with his tongue, all the while moaning into him as Cas was giving him similar favors.

 

“This is like the human centipede of blowjobs.” Dean laughed, both Sam and Cas making disgusted noises. “Right. Bad thing to mention during sex.”

 

Sam and Cas both made joint noises of agreement as Cas moved up and down faster and edged Sam closer toward his tipping point. Sam let out a final loud moan and Cas took Sam's length in all the way and kept his mouth there as quieter moans followed in succession.

 

“Fuck.” Sam whimpered as he came up for air from pleasing Dean.

 

Cas sat up off of Sam and moved further up towards Dean, beginning to kiss him. He didn't swallow, but didn't spit either, and Dean ended up with a tongueful of come being rubbed against his mouth. Cas had just sucked off Sam and was passing all the come into Dean's mouth and Dean had never had anyone do that with him before and the whole concept of it was just  _ so hot _ .

 

“S-Sam.” Dean stammered, clumsily using his hand to push Sam's face away from him just enough to not get come in his mouth, but end up with it all over his nose and lips.

 

“I would have preferred the mouth.” Sam snorted. “Easier to clean up.”

 

“Sorry.” Dean replied, collapsing onto the blankets and then groaning at how cold they were.

 

“We need to get these sheets off.” Sam stated.

 

“Uh-huh.” Cas replied, laying down next to Sam. “Not doing it.”

 

“God dammit.” Sam sighed. “I'll do it in a minute.”

 

The three of them laid next to each other, coming down from their highs, getting their breath back.

 

“Anyone else hungry?” Cas asked.

 

“How can you think about food?” Dean scoffed.

 

“Because I haven't eaten since fucking noon.” Cas argued. “Who wants pizza?”

 

“We're getting pizza. I'm not cooking.” Sam laughed, sitting up. “Why don't you guys put something warm on and order and I'll put some clean sheets on here?”

 

“Deal.” Cas replied.

 

“Deal.” Dean nodded, both of them sitting up together.

“Not that I don't enjoy sitting around in my underwear with my ex eating pizza and drinking beer, but I should probably go.” Dean said, standing up from the couch.

 

“Like hell you are.” Cas scoffed.

 

“What does that mean?” Dean asked.

 

“You've been drinking. I'm not letting you get in that car.” Cas frowned.

 

“I'll get a taxi.” Dean replied.

 

“And then come back in another taxi to pick up your car tomorrow morning?” Cas asked.

 

“Yeah.” Dean nodded.

 

“No that's just extra hassle and money you don't need to spend.” Cas argued. 

 

“I don't mind, really.” Dean responded.

“I do. Stay here. Save your money. We don't bite.” Cas huffed. “Well, I do if you want.”

 

“Don't encourage it, though.” Sam snickered. “But you can stay, I don't mind if that's what you're worried about.”

 

“If you're sure, I mean. I don't...have an aversion to it.” Dean sighed.

 

“No issue at all for either of us.” Sam smiled.

 

“What happened to you?” Cas asked. “You went from inviting us to have a threesome to being all shy and awkward now that you're here.”

 

“I think the reality is just daunting. “ Dean stated. “And I'm not shy and awkward for the record. This is just a very moral grey area for me.”

 

“Well, not anymore.” Sam mused.

 

“If I'm gonna be crashing on your couch, you mind if I shower first?” Dean asked, giving into them.

 

“You don't have to crash on our couch.” Sam sighed. “We can all fit in the bed.”

 

“I..Yeah. I know. I just don't know if it's really appropriate to be doing that with someone you used to date.” Dean mutttered.

 

“I think some would argue it's also not appropriate to sleep with them and their husband, so fuck what's appropriate. Neither of us care.” Sam protested. “Our relationship is not so painfully fragile that we are going to be ruined for life by having you stay the night here.”

 

“That's not what I was getting at.” Dean groaned.

 

“Whatever you say, Mr. Insecurity.” Sam snickered.

 

“I'm not insecure!” Dean argued.

 

“Yes you are. Go shower.” Sam laughed.

 

“Did you start the washer?” Cas asked.

 

“No, I'm waiting until the morning when electricity is a bit cheaper.” Sam answered.

 

“Ew. Gross. You can't just let that all sit and fester there. “ Cas grimaced. “Go start the washer.”

 

“Is this what married couples do? Because it sounds boring.” Dean teased.

 

“Go get in the shower, young man.” Cas growled, giving him a teasing look. Dean laughed quietly as he turned around and headed back towards the bedroom. “Now  _ you _ go start the washer.”

 

“Just tell everyone what to do, why don't you?” Sam scoffed.

 

“Alright.” Cas nodded, leaning back against the couch and taking another drink of his beer.

 

After a series of beeps that was the washing machine, Sam came back into the room and stood behind his husband, putting his hands on Cas's shoulders and leaning down to kiss his cheek. “You like him don't you?”

 

“Of course I like him.” Cas replied, looking up at him. “He's kind.”

 

“He's never not been kind.” Sam mused. “But you know that's not what I meant.“ 

 

“If you’re implying that I'm attracted to him, well he invited me to have sex with him and I said yes so I don't think that should be much of a surprise to you.” Cas replied.

 

“That's still not what I meant.” Sam chuckled, clumsily climbing over the back of the couch and falling onto the cushions.

 

“What did you mean then?” Cas sighed.

 

“Nothing. It's irrelevant.” Sam snorted, giving Cas a small kiss on the lips.

 

“You should give him another chance, Sam.” Cas said after a minute.

 

“What?” Sam laughed.

 

“Give him another chance. He still loves you. I can tell.” Cas replied.

 

“He doesn't still love me. He's not that clingy.” Sam stated. “I can't exactly give him another chance anyways. I'm already married unless you forgot.”

 

“I didn't forget, Sam.” Cas sighed. “But I don't think you should dismiss him. It's not like you left him because you weren't in love.”

 

“No, I left him because despite the fact we loved each other, you gave me a more promising and healthy relationship and future.” Sam stated.

 

“Give him another chance, Sam.” Cas repeated. “He means well. “

 

“He would never forgive me for what I did. I left him for someone else. Someone that I had been sleeping around on him with behind his back.” Sam replied.

 

“He doesn't forgive you? He just fucked the guy you did all that with. I think it's behind him.” Cas scoffed.

 

“Say all of that is true...“ Sam began. “I'm not leaving you.”

 

“Fuck no you’re not!“ Cas exclaimed. “The only way you're divorcing me is if I'm six feet under and even then it'll be one hell of an uphill battle.”

 

“Exactly. I'm not divorcing you even if I wanted to. So don't try to convince me to do otherwise for the man I left to be with you in the first place.”

 

“I'm not saying to leave me, you knucklehead.“ Cas snorted. “I'm saying stay with me but also take him back.”

 

“What? At the same time?” Sam laughed.

 

“Yes!” Cas smiled.

 

“Cas. You know I love you, but this is the most idiotic thing that’s come out of your mouth in a long time.” Sam stated.

 

“That's hard to believe.” Cas mused.

 

“Dean and I dated. We lived together. But there's a reason that relationship ended.“

 

“Yeah because you couldn't keep your dick in your pants.” Cas retorted.

 

“Because he was shutting me out. He's the same person and I'm the same person. If by some twist of fate, I did take him back, it would inevitably go bad again.“ Sam explained.

 

“Yes, but did you ever stop to think  _ why _ he was shutting you out, Sam?” Cas asked. “In all the time you were with me and talked to me about how isolated you felt, you never once mentioned talking to him about it and trying to work things out.“

 

“Yeah but-” Sam started.

 

“Don't  _ yeah but _ me!” Cas scoffed. “It's the truth isn't it?”

 

“I didn't need to talk to him to know that...I don't know.” Sam sighed.

 

“That's the thing about relationships, Sam. You have to communicate for things to work out.” Cas groaned. “You never talked to him. Maybe once he's out of the shower you and him should finally have that talk. I saw the way he looked at you. He loved you. He still does. And you don't love someone like that and shut them out for no random reason.”

 

“You're my husband. Not my past relationship counselor.” Sam drawled.

 

“Do it, Samuel.” Cas grumbled. “He'll be out of the shower soon, and when he gets out, I'm going to already be gone to go buy groceries or something dumb and domestic like that.” Cas stated.

 

“Besides,” Cas added, standing up from the couch. “You think it was just coincidence he saw me in that café and decided to help me? Coincidences don't happen. You're supposed to make this right.”

 

“This is not some sign from the universe, Cas.” Sam groaned. “Get a grip.”

 

“As soon as you do, I will.” Cas replied, grabbing a bathrobe off the back of their bedroom door and wrapping it around himself.

 

“You're going grocery shopping in bathrobe?” Sam asked.

 

“I don't know what I'm doing yet. But yes, it's happening in a bathrobe.” Cas replied. “Where the fuck are my keys?”

 

When Dean got out of the shower, he had put his boxers back on and towel-dried his hair, leaving it sticking out in all directions.

“Hey, do you have a phone charger?” He asked. “My battery is low and I don't want it to die.”

 

“Yeah, sure right on the counter behind me.” Sam stated.

 

“Thanks. The one time I think it'd be okay to let it go dead, would be the one time something bad would happen and someone would need to contact me.” Dean mused.

 

“Isn't the universe a bitch like that?” Sam sighed, sinking down into the couch a little.

 

“Is something wrong?” Dean frowned.

 

“No, I'm fine.” Sam smiled, looking up at him as he circled back around to the couch where Sam was sitting.

 

“You sure?” Dean asked.

 

Yeah”. Sam nodded, taking his phone off the table and checking the time.

 

“Where's Cas?” Dean asked.

 

“He went out grocery shopping or something 'stupid and domestic like that'.“ Sam chuckled.

 

“You seem pissed off.” Dean stated.

 

“I'm not pissed off.” Sam protested.

 

“I used to live with you. You're pissed off about something.” Dean replied. “What'd I do?”

 

“Nothing. It wasn't you.” Sam sighed.

 

“So, Cas is grounded, not getting groceries?” Dean smirked.

 

“No, not that either. He's doing whatever the hell he wants. I don't know what that means and I don't know if I want to.” Sam laughed.

 

“ You seem really happy with him.” Dean breathed.

 

“I am.” Sam responded, his phone buzzing and lighting up as he got a text. “Speak of the devil.”

 

As Sam went to unlock it, he dropped it and it bounced off his foot over to Dean. Dean reached down to pick it up and frowned at Sam as he handed it to him.

 

“What are you supposed to ask me?”

 

“Fuck.” Sam hissed, looking at the screen and seeing a bright text from Cas asking if he'd asked Dean about 'the thing' yet.

 

“What?” Dean repeated. “What are you supposed to ask me?”

 

“Nothing.” Sam grumbled. “He's just being an ass.”

 

“No.” Dean argued. “What does he want you to ask me and why don't you want to ask?”

 

“It's nothing, Dean.” Sam said sternly.

 

“Bullshit.” Dean huffed sitting down on the couch next to him and grabbing his face in one hand, bringing his cheeks together. “Stop lying to me. You know you can't.”

 

“Did I ever mention how godawful annoying that is of you?” Sam groaned.

 

“You frequently did, yes.” Dean replied. “So what the hell does he want you to ask me?”

 

“Drop it, Dean.” Sam growled.

 

“No.” Dean replied defiantly. “I’m not a dog.” 

 

“He...wanted to know what condom size you need because he wants to see you again.” Sam stated.

 

“Still lying to me.” Dean scowled, taking his hand off Sam's face.

 

“It's been years, Dean!” Sm groaned. “How the fuck can you still tell?”

 

“Because of course I can tell! You're like an open book to me. You always have been.“ Dean huffed. “Can't you see that?”

 

“No.” Sam shook his head quietly and looked away, grimacing. 

 

“What now?” Dean frowned. 

 

“He's right isn't he?” Sam asked. “You still love me.”

 

“I...What?” Dean asked.

 

“You still love me.” Sam stated.

 

“I don't see how that's relevant to anything.” Dean said.

 

“So, you do.” Sam nodded. “God dammit, I hate when he's right about this kind of shit.”

 

“What kind of shit? What are you supposed to ask me, Sam?” Dean demanded.

 

Sam looked back at him and swallowed something in his throat tensely. 

 

“He told me to ask you what was going on with you when I left you.” Sam mustered out through gritted teeth.

 

“What was going on with me?” Dean questioned.

 

“Yeah. I was talking with him and we were talking and he said our relationship didn't work out because I couldn't stay faithful and I said I couldn't stay faithful because you were shutting me out and then he got bitter with me because he said you and I never even tried to communicate about anything and I had no idea what was going on with you at the time and I assumed that the whole situation was about me and never stopped to think that maybe you might have been going through something, too.” Sam explained.

 

“Whoa.” Dean whispered. “Okay.”

 

“See why I didn't want to bring it up?” Sam asked.

 

“Yeah.” Dean nodded. “But forget it. It's, you know...history is history.” Dean replied with a small yet pained smile.

 

“History is only history if it's in the past. And you’re not in the past anymore.  _ We’re _ not in the past anymore, Dean.” Sam stated. “So I want an answer now, too. What did I ignore?”

 

“You didn't ignore anything.” Dean replied.

 

“Bullshit. Cas said that you wouldn't have just casually drifted away from someone you loved like you loved me.” Sam stated.

 

“That's true. I didn't drift away. But that doesn't mean you were at fault about anything.”

 

“If I wasn't at fault, then tell me what happened. What was so bad that you couldn't tell me?” Sam asked. “What made you turn away from me back then?”

 

“It wasn't you, Sam.” Dean said, putting his hands on Sam's . “It had nothing to do with you, I promise.”

 

“Then why alienate me from you? Why not confide in me and trust me like you're supposed to do with your boyfriends and girlfriends and partners that you  _ live with _ ?” Sam demanded.

 

“I...It doesn't matter now. It’s done and gone and in the past and it's all behind us.” Dean said.

 

“I don't care if it's behind us I want to fucking know, Dean!” Sam shouted. “What ruined us?” 

 

“I did. I take accountability for that. That's all you need to know.” 

 

“No. What I needed to know then and what I need to know then is what was wrong with you? What was affecting your life so badly?” Sam argued. “Tell me, Dean.”

 

“Why do you care so much now?” Dean asked.

 

“Because until twenty fucking minutes ago, I thought that we were just drifting apart and you were the problem but twenty minutes ago, my husband made me realize that  _ I  _ was probably the problem here.”

 

“I need to know this, Dean.” Sam whimpered. “You were my whole world and I left you instead of helping you which is what I should have done and now I realize that.”

 

“Fine, you want to know?” Dean sighed. “I went to the doctor about those headaches I was having if you remember and after the medicine didn't help, he had me get an MRI. And uh...that MRI showed that I had a very massive brain tumour that was so large it was inoperable and it was going to kill me and I couldn't break the news to you.”

 

“You had a fucking  _ what _ ?” Sam exclaimed. “How are you alive right now then?!”

 

“Because it turns out I didn't have a brain tumor. I had a minor concussion - probably thanks to you and how many times you'd accidentally hurt me during sex but – the MRI scans got damaged after an intern spilled coffee on them and was too scared to come forward and somewhere along the way they got misread and written down as well, a brain tumour. So that whole time I thought I was going to die until they took me in for another scan after you left me and they realized that I was actually totally fine and just needed some bed-rest.”

 

“Why the hell wouldn't you tell me something like that?” Sam shouted. “What the fuck is wrong with you?”

 

“You were my boyfriend! You were the love of my life! If I was going to die, I didn't want to die with my most recent memories of you being depressed and crying because I was going to die!” Dean argued.

 

“Did you not even think to try and explain any of this to me afterwards, after I got together with Cas?” Sam scoffed.

 

“No!” Because you'd fucking left me for another man over the course of a few months!” Dean exclaimed. “So sorry if I felt that you didn't give two shits about my well-being anymore, especially considering I was basically fine!”

 

“A fucking intern and their fucking stupid ass motherfucking coffee ruined our relationship!” Sam scowled.

 

“No.” Dean whimpered, beginning to cry. “We both did.”

 

“Nonnonononononono, don't cry!” Sam protested, grabbing him and hugging him. “I'm sorry Dean.”

 

“I am, too.” Dean whimpered, letting Sam caress his hair and kiss the side of his face.

 

“This was all preventable.” Dean sighed. “I should have been honest with you.” Dean sobbed, holding onto Sam tightly.

 

“I should have thought more about you instead of running to the first set of open legs for comfort.” Sam replied, starting to cry along with him.

 

“There wasn't anything wrong with us the whole time...” Dean whimpered.

 

“Do you think Cas is right, Dean?”

 

“About what?” Dean replied.

 

“Do you think that nothing's changed? That maybe there's nothing wrong with us now?” Sam asked.

 

“I...What are you asking, Sam?” Dean replied, pulling away from him and taking a deep sniff as he looked at him.

 

“Do you really still love me?” Sam breathed.

 

“What are you asking, Sam?” Dean repeated.

 

“Cas told me to take you back.” Sam whispered.

 

“No.” Dean shook his head. “I'm not going to do that. You're happy and he's happy and you’re married and I missed my chance.”

 

“No, I know. I know, Dean. He said he'd never let me go even if I wanted to and I believe him.” He replied. “But he said to take you back anyways.”

 

“What does that mean?” Dean asked.

 

“I don't know,.” Sam laughed. “And right now I don't really care.”

 

“Can I kiss you?” Dean sighed.

 

“Yeah.” Sam nodded, breaking out in a smile. Sam grabbed Dean and started kissing him sloppily, lips not quite where they should be but neither of them cared.

 

I still love you, Dean.” Sam whispered.

 

“I still love you, too. I never stopped, Sam.” Dean stated. “I never stopped.”

 

“Now how many years did that take for me to fix your relationship?” Cas asked.

 

“When the fuck did you get here?” Dean scoffed.

 

“Right when the crying started.” Cas replied, undoing the bathrobe and walking over to the bedroom. “So what do we all want to do?”

 

“To do?” Sam asked.

 

“Well, yeah. You two love each other. But us two love each other, too. There's going to have to be a solution somewhere.” Cas stated.

 

“Don't make me choose.” Sam sighed.

 

“I'm not making you choose. I mean technically I am, but not which one of us you want to be with.” Cas mused. “How do you feel about sharing?”

 

“Sharing?” Sam scoffed.

 

“Twice the men, twice the love.” Dean stated.

 

“Yeah.” Cas nodded. “Something like that.”

 

“How would anything like that work?” Sam asked.

 

“Do you really care right now?” Cas countered.

 

“No.” Sam laughed, shaking his head and wiping the tears off of his face and then going to wipe off Dean's.

 

“I sense the universe just righted one of its biggest wrongs.” Cas smiled, going over to the two of them and kissing each of their foreheads. “I hope we all learned a valuable lesson today about communication and it's importance in relationships and may all of us prosper from it.” Cas stated.

 

“Yeah.” Dean and Sam said at the same time.

 

“Want to go get in bed and snuggle?” Cas asked.

 

“See? That's the sweet Cas I was expecting earlier.” Dean smiled.

 

“Even assholes can like snuggling.” Cas replied.

 

“You're not an asshole. You're amazing.” Dean grinned.

 

“That's a yes, right? Because I think we're all freezing at this point, sitting around in our underwear?” Cas asked.

 

“Yes.” Sam nodded with a laugh.


End file.
